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As a habitual caffeine abuser, I have a soft spot for Monster, both for their expansive lineup of flavors as well as their support for Sports and E-sports. Coffee is my standard caffeination vector, so the Java Monster suite of products is the perfect mix of bean flavor and energy boost. In this post, I'll provide my personal rankings and rationale for what is a very strong lineup.
Note that I have not been compensated in any way for this write-up... I just like them.
Currently, Monster Energy's Java Monster lineup has five available flavors:
- Mean Bean - Vanilla
- Irish Crème
- Loca Mocha - Chocolate
- Salted Caramel
- Café Latte
There are two "triple shot" versions of the Vanilla and Mocha which contain 300mg of caffeine though their flavors are very similar to the base versions above. At this point, we should also take a moment of silence for the two cold brew flavors, sweet black and nitro latte. The nitro latte was a personal favorite and I quite liked the sweet black, but both cans were polarizing and the nitro aspect added logistical complexity. In contrast to the current lineup, both of the cold brew flavors were relatively mild, significantly more coffee forward and less sweet. Though it had only been two years since their release in 2022, they were cancelled in 2024 much to my dismay.
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| Gone but not forgotten! |
Moving on to the current lineup, my favorite thing about Java Monsters is that the first ingredient in all of the flavors is "brewed coffee", followed by skim milk, cream, and glucose. They do have the Monster standard energy drink components of taurine, ginseng, guarana extract, and caffeine plus some B vitamins and the usual preservatives/natural flavors. All in all, you have what basically amounts to a standard Monster Energy beverage with Coffee instead of water. Nutritionally, they have around 200 calories each and 28-36grams of sugar, so we are talking about soda or dessert level sweetness. In all but one of these, the coffee takes a back seat to the highlighted flavor. Without further ado, here is the Castle & Cairn Java Monster power rankings.
5. Salted Caramel Java Monster
Holding up the lineup from fifth, Salted Caramel delivers on its name in spades. If you enjoy caramel flavored coffee creamer, this can is for you. While I still enjoy it, there is a metallic quality to caramel flavoring that doesn't reach the heights of other flavors. Salted Caramel does have the distinction of being the lowest in sugar, and consequently calories, of the current lineup.
4. Irish Crème Java Monster
With the coolest can of the lot, Java Monster Irish Crème got a new recipe and facelift in 2024, now featuring a cool looking leprechaun skeleton, harps, pots-o-gold, and horseshoes. It does a faithful job of tasting like an Irish Coffee. A very sweet one.
3. Loca Mocha Java Monster
Chocolate has long been a cornerstone coffee flavor and Loca Moca brings the coca. Don't expect much coffee flavor, it's much more mocha Frappuccino.
2. Mean Bean Java Monster
As far as flavored coffees go, latte with vanilla may be the most classic combination. This mean can provides vanilla bean flavor while still allowing for some coffee taste to shine through. Many have this as their overall favorite can, but I think one other option just edges it out.
1. Café Latte Java Monster
Providing the most coffee flavor by far, Java Monster Café Latte packs the same sugary punch as the other contenders. After the demise of the cold brew options, Café Latte represents the coffee lover's choice out of the current lineup.
Outro
If you like sweetness, coffee, and energy, Java Monsters are for you! They have a bit more oomph compared to other canned coffees and apply towards Monster Energy promos. I'm ripping one and jumping on Call of Duty Black Ops Zombies.
